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Title: Valentine (2001)
Format: DVD
Score:
Starring: Denise Richards, David Boreanaz, Marley Shelton, Jessica Capshaw, and Jessica Cauffiel
Director: Jamie Blanks
Rating: R (Restricted)
Runtime: 96 minutes
Hits: 213
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Review of Valentine

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Comments for Valentine

• Posted on 2009-08-07
  Eros and Arrows
  
  It's moody and atmospheric, and avoids 8 ot 9 of the 100 serial killer movie cliches, so I give it four stars. I found the Cupid cherub mask sort of scary, though the bloody nose that the killer sprouted seemed like--DNA? It's a little bit like SCREAM in that the best known cast member gets bumped off first--only at the time of release, VALENTINE's first victim wasn't anywhere near as well known as she is today, so what does that say about the movie's originality? Not much I guess. The victim in question has red Lindsay Lohan hair, and weighs about 25 pounds more than she does today in the age of her superstardom.
  
  The main story in the movie revolves around Marley Shelton and her inability to trust her boyfriend who drinks too much. I think that the movie's writers probably had some personal experience of the 12 step kind, because no matter how much product David B. puts onto his hair, you just can't trust him to stay on the wagon. The movie is set in San Francisco and I will watch any set-in-San-Francisco, filmed in Vancouver movie two or three times, and this one really holds up. Not because of Marley Shelton's acting--she is uncharacteristically terrible here, perhaps uncomfortable in having to play a girl with an unpleasant past. All of these I Know What You Did Last Summer movies, where now grown adults suffer for an act of cruelty they committed while teenagers, have the same ambivalence towards repentance and retribution. Not once do any of the girls admit they did anything wrong to Jeremy Melton. Pity that. It might have made all the difference in the world, and prevented wealthy Dorothy's Valentine's party from becoming a bloodbath.
  
  My favorite character is Kate's crazy neighbor down the hall who speaks only in rhymes to her, "Want a date, Kate? I think you're great, Kate." The scene where we find out what this guy, dressed in his underwear, *really* wants from Kate is the only scene that reminded me of actual life in San Francisco. They should have thrown the rest of the film away and just started building on that one scene.
  
  
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• Posted on 2009-07-20
  'Entertaining Horror Film"
  
  I have always liked "Valentine", an interesting slasher film from 2001 that was not a boxoffice hit. The film has also not been very popular in recent years and fans have pretty much forgot about it. Still, "Valentine stands out as a good popcorn scary film that is a great whodunit movie.
  "Valentine" is about a bunch of people being killed around Valentine's Day and as the audience it is up to us to figure out who the culprit is. Most of the victims are untalented actresses so it's a joy to see some of the caracters being dispatched. It's obvious from the beginning of the movie that the killer, as a young child, was teased by his peers, and now as an adult is seeking revenge on those who tormented him.
  David Boreanaz, from TV's "Bones", steals the film with his great looks and good acting. The only other good actor in "Valentine" is Denise Richards. The rest of the cast is pretty much unforgettable.
  The DVD comes with audio commentary by the director Jamie Blanks, there are cast interviews, and more. The film is in widescreen and is single layered. Subtitles are in english and french.
  The L.A. Times said that "Valentine" "is smart, stylish horror and expertly structured".
  
  
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• Posted on 2009-05-17
  YET ANOTHER UNINSPIRED HALLOWEEN RIP OFF! 1 1/2 STARS!
  
  Another dull entry in the slasher film genre. This one has a decent cast, but little else. This film's only saving grace is the ending even if it's a bit predictable. My biggest problem with this film is that we've seen it all before and done better. You don't have to look to closely to see the obvious similarities to 'Halloween' and many other superior films.
  
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• Posted on 2009-04-26
  VALENTINE VIEWPOINT
  
  This isn't as horrible a movie as some people would like you to believe, but on the other hand, it's not particularly "scary" for a horror film, and once you see it a second time, you see all the clues that are dropped right in your lap. This is one of those films that deliberately doesn't set itself up for a sequel, as everyone dies in the end (more or less). It follows the silent, masked killer gimmick, which is fine, as no one wants someone wisecracking while he's trying to kill you, because only certain actors can pull it off.
  
  Speaking of actors, let's talk about the cast. The cast is entirely composed of hot young stars that clearly are cast to attempt to appeal to the younger audience. So, in theory, with the star power that this film was able to attract, this should be a terrific movie (and really, it isn't a horrible movie in the slightest, and not nearly as cliched as people would lead you to believe, either. However, the problem is that Hollywood loves to cast "pretty people" in TV and movies, and this film is no exception from Beverly Hills 90210's Daniel Cosgrove to Rosewell's Katherine Heigl to always reliable Denise Richards to popular attractive star Marley Shelton to Buffy the Vampire Slayer's David Boreanaz.
  
  The problem? Pretty people are nice to look at in the looks-obsessed movie business, but not all of them can act. David Boreanaz is great as Angel because the role requires him to be wooden. That's the biggest letdown of this film, as it seems obvious that Mr. Boreanaz was hired to basically be Angel in a different film. Hopefully, he wasn't told by the director to be stiff. He shows so much more personality as evil Angelus on Buffy than any other time.
  
  The other actresses are fine, but Katherine Heigl is wasted in her too-short part that was only about 20 minutes long. It is said she had commitments to Roswell, so she could only afford to film for a few days. Her part could have been edited out and it wouldn't hurt the movie one way or the other.
  
  If you're the kind who likes to play whodunnit, you'll figure it out soon enough. The film does drop some red herrings to attempt to throw you off track, but the few false clues it does leave are kind of obvious in the fact that they are fake. At about death #2, you'll start putting together the pieces, so really, that was the worst death, since that was the one that was the most obvious tip-off to the killer's identity. Really, if you pay attention, you'll figure out the killer before you're halfway through. The deaths also follow a certain trend, set up at the beginning of the film, so pay attention.
  
  The film does leave a little mystery at the end, but the mystery that is set up isn't the mystery that people want to know. The mystery that the film attempts to set up kind of falls on its face.
  
  That said, some of the deaths are really kind of creative and a lot of fun, really. Perhaps some people, having grown up on Jason and Freddy and that sort of thing, with tons of gore, won't like it. On the other hand, while not as cerebral as Psycho, the killer is grounded in reality and doesn't magically manifest his weapons, it's all there if you look for it.
  
  Not a lot of gore, but there ARE some fairly violent deaths. It doesn't follow the typical formula of psycho killer kills everyone because he can, this is a killer who is a definite sociopath, and has a very specific target for his wrath. He does deviate a slight bit, but it's necessary to make sure no one can identify him.
  
  For the ladies, there's hunks like Boreanaz and Cosgrove, and for the men there's all the lovely ladies, especially Richards in her bikini in the hot tub (and the pseudo sex-scene before it, which is actually kind of funny, unless you're a guy!) and Marley Shelton wearing a terry-cloth towel.
  
  Overall, a fun movie. Definitely a film to watch with your significant other (to comfort her during the scary parts)!
  
  
  
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• Posted on 2009-02-14
  HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!
  
  Today is Valentine's day, so I thought I'd review this movie! This is an awesome slasher and has a great storyline! At a Valentine dance, a nerdy kid named Jeremy Melton asks 4 smokin' hot popular girls to dance, but they all cruelly reject him. Dorothy accepts Jeremy's invitation and they start to make out behind the bleachers. Some school bullies see them, so Dorothy tells them that Jeremy tried to sexually assault her, then the bullies taunt and severely beat Jeremy up in front of everyone. Years later, a man with a knife and a Cupid mask begin to stalk and kill all the women who rejected him. From sending gothic Valentine cards, and chocolate filled with maggots. If you love horror, and Valentine's day, you'll love VALENTINE!!!
  
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